Throw Away The Remote

Throw away the remote

Tim Connor

I am confident you have at least one remote on a coffee table in your living room and that you hit various buttons frequently. And why?  Well, any number of reasons; eliminate commercials, check on the latest scores or to just change channels or mute something you have lost interest in.  So what’s the relationship between your remote and life’s remote?

Most remote devices have a fast forward and rewind button that you can hit when you are watching a show - you have seen or want to find out what happens to see if you want to watch the entire episode.  Do we do this due to a lack of patience, frustration or some other emotional trigger?  It depends and varies from person to person, but the motives are always the same – you don’t like what is happening now and you want to check something else out or revisit the past.

Life for many is lived either in fast forward or rewind as very few people are satisfied to just leave the show (their life) in “play mode” and leave the remote alone.

Why do we fast forward?

I could go on for pages but I believe it’s for one of three reasons.

We are dissatisfied for some reason with what is going on in our life now due to any number of reasons as they are causing stress, worry, frustration and even anger.  Or just simple uncertainty that that is a normal part of “now”.

Why do we go into rewind?

OK, I remember when cars had bumpers, Snickers bars were .25 c and gas was .15 c a gallon, yes I know, a long time ago but regardless of whether it was yesterday, five minutes ago or 30 years ago the rule is the same – it’s; history, gone, over, finished, vanished or a statistic.  And, there is nothing you can do to bring it back, do it over, change the outcomes, make it better or avoid it.  It’s gone - history – get it?  So why do people spend over 50% of their mental time stewing over yesterday’s stuff?

What do you think?

Here’s what I think.

It’s called remorse, regret, disappointment, guilt, shame, sorrow or anything else you can think of.  Again, why do we waste precious now minutes on stuff that is gone and stuff we can’t do anything about?  Well, yes we can try and make the best of past poor decisions, wrong judgment or incorrect points of view, but we can’t change their cause.  Yes, learn from them, adapt because of them, bring their lessons into the now so you can avoid repeating them but to whine, moan or feel any negative emotions due to these historical events is useless.

Why can’t we just leave the remote in play?

Let me wrap this up and make it simple – re-read the above and then spend some quiet time in self-reflection to see how much mental time you spend and waste in the future or past.  And if you feel this might be helpful, why not make a few notes in a journal about lessons learned.  You never know – it might just help you create a better now therefore a better future and past.