Changing course

Changing Course

Tim Connor

Just because you think you are heading in the right direction doesn’t mean you are and it doesn’t mean you aren’t. So what’s the answer, how do we know if we are heading in the right or wrong direction in life?

There are leaders, followers and those who don’t fit into either group and I’m not referring here to CEO’s, executives or people in charge of others but rather everyone who is on a life path into the future whatever that means, whatever it manifests or whatever it entails along the way.

If you are lost while driving you can; check your GPS, stop and ask for directions, refer to a map or just keep on getting more lost due to arrogance, ego, ignorance or fear.

I know on a few occasions in life I have felt lost whether in a relationship, business, a career or just life in general and I can tell you not knowing what to do next or where to turn can be frightening and stressful but in the end sooner or later each of us will face this drama in life as there are many things that impact our life that we can’t control.

To me, being lost simply means I am out of touch with reality, I am too insecure to ask for help or something in life just isn’t turning out as I have planned, would like or hoped for.  This, my friends is a normal circumstance for all humans who want to achieve more with their life in some way.

So, if we are lost what can we do, what our options and how do we know if the course change we make will be the right one, the best one or considering our resources, experience, talent or time?

First of all we need to ask a few serious questions; am I really lost, how did I get lost and what are my options?

Am I really lost –

Lost - unable to find the way to a place. There are several ways someone can be lost – and I’m not referring to losing your keys. We can feel lost; emotionally, financially, in relationships, career or business or just life in general. When we feel lost (aimless, uncertain, fearful or meaningless) we will often default into a mental state of confusion, disorder or even chaos.  If you are feeling any of these negative emotions, thoughts or feelings ask yourself – are these a recurring condition, a temporary one or a pattern in my life? If they are sudden or temporary you are not lost just in a current state of tension.  If they are recurring – there is more going on here than meets the eye.

How did I get lost – 

I could go on for pages with this one but here are a few of the common causes or contributors.  A lack of clear goals, letting others or circumstances dictate the quality or circumstances of your life, personal doubt when it comes to your outcomes, a lack of patience regarding your progress, mindsets of fear, worry or anxiety, the fear of failure or making mistakes, the need for approval or acceptance of others, ego, arrogance or self-centeredness.

What are some of my options –  Here are a few to consider.

1)Spend time in reflection asking yourself – why, when, how.

2)Get clarity on your goals, purpose or life or career mission/purpose.

3)Read and study more (ask me for my recommended reading list).

4)Get a mentor or personal coach.

5)Let go of attitudes, mindsets, beliefs or values that may be keeping you stuck.

6)Consider counseling.

7)Spend more time in prayer, meditation and/or silence.

8)Start a life journal keeping daily notes about; decisions, actions, attitudes, reactions, responses, outcomes, consequences, feelings, emotions and dominant or consistent thoughts.

9)Let go of your ego needs and be willing to take responsibility for your outcomes and/or consequences.

10)Start asking yourself some serious questions and be willing to get in touch with reality.

In conclusion sometimes being lost can be a valuable time in life as it can cause you to reconsider, reevaluate, revisit or help you see where you need to make some changes in some area of your life.

“Only in growth, reform and change, paradoxically enough, is true security found.” 

Ann Morrow Lindbergh