It’s all trivia . . .

It’s all trivia . . .

Tim Connor

You are born then you die – the rest and everything in between is all trivia. I can hear you now – “are you crazy, don’t you have a clue as to what I have to put up with every day – kids, bosses, customers, spouses, family, financial challenges, career decisions, fellow employees.” – “Yes, I hear you – and - blah, blah, blah, and again – blah, blah, blah.”

Now is a very short time and eternity is forever and I don’t give a rip about what you believe or don’t spiritually – there is more to the life experience than just 60 or 70 years on earth dealing with its trivia. 

Now don’t get me wrong – natural disasters that take your home away, criminals who steal a loved one from you or getting diagnosed with a life threating disease in your teens is big stuff but in the end looking back over your life, let me ask you - did you spend too much valuable time in stress, worry, frustration, anxiety, despair, discouragement, fear etc. on stuff that really didn’t matter or that you came to realize it wasn’t worth the emotional energy, time or resources you gave it?  I’ll bet every one of you, if you are honest, the answer is yes to something or even a lot.

So, what is trivia – well for starters it depends on several factors; your expectations that don’t come to fruition, your time and effort that end with failure or more problems, the money spent on stuff that you recently threw away or donated, relationships that end badly or too soon – I could go on but if you are honest you will come to the same conclusions – in the end when you are getting ready to head over to the other side and your time here is finished none of that will have been worth giving it more than it deserved.

Why do we stress and fret over life’s trivia – is it ego, the need for control, the desire to look good or achieve other’s approval or something else much deeper?

I believe the life approach to overrating trivial stuff that is one of the significant factors is simply self-aggrandizement or the basic need to feel like who you are and what you do – matter. This need includes the ability to accept who you are, no matter where you are in life, to be OK with what you have or don’t have and the belief that what you do is important – from being mother or a janitor, from the sales rep to the CEO, from the retiree to the 20 year-old.

Let me ask you – are you stressing today about anything?  Come on be honest.  OK if not today how about this week or this month or even this year? Or, do you feel in total control of every aspect of your life – I will seriously doubt the latter – that is unless you are living in denial in a cave somewhere in Colorado.

Why not spend a little time creating what I call a “I am in control of - list and a what I am not in control of - list?” You might be surprised at what shows up on both lists but in the end the stuff on your can’t control list is all trivia folks whether you agree with me or not or whether you like it or not.

I won’t bore you with my 50 plus years of career, financial, business and relationship challenges, but looking back now the realization that I gave them more time and energy than they deserved is a far greater disappointment than the actual stuff that happened.

So before I move on to my next trivial matter let me just say that whatever you are dealing with or facing in life now or today over - time will be lost in large wastebasket of regrets.