Friday, April 11, 2014

The myth of the quick fix



The myth of the quick fix
Tim Connor

Why is it that so many people today are in such a hurry to change things, fix things and get nowhere fast?  Seriously, what’s the rush?  No one can know what will happen in the next minute, day or year so why is humanity trying to take total control of the future?
Is it insecurity, fear, arrogance or some other dysfunctional life approach?  I’m not being disrespectful to those of you who feel rushing is just the way life is and to get through it you have to swim with the current, but come on, no one knows how much time they have left and no one and I mean no one will get everything they want, solve every problem to their satisfaction, achieve every goal or do everything they want to do while they are here – it’s just the way life is, always has been and always will be.

I like to achieve, be in control, get things done on my schedule, but life keeps nudging me with this often subtle message – you are not in control of everything and never will be so what’s your rush?

We all - face challenges and problems, have things on our to do lists, need to get decisions made now and solutions to every issue sooner rather than later, but life is a wonderful teacher - so the question is - are we good students or will we spend more time than we want or necessary in detention?

I will guarantee that today something or someone will disappoint you and why?  For starters all disappointment is grounded in expectations and no one can control other’s behavior or most of life’s circumstances.

Yes, we can try, hope, plan, work etc. but in the end life wants us all to learn the lessons that we need to learn and if we don’t pay attention to the subtle urgings life sends us, it will one day hit us over the head with a whack (pay attention, grow, learn – it’s time!)

The quick fix – do it now, fix it now, change it now, solve it now, learn it now, let it go now, go there now – get it – the common denominator is now.  Problem is – now can take a lot longer than this moment, day or even year.  Some lessons take time.  All growth takes time and most of life’s issues can’t be fixed now because they require more than a knee-jerk response to their causes or contributors.

Learning is a process and until we accept that we can’t control all of life’s conditions we will live with frustration, anxiety, fear and a great deal of stress.  And it’s all unnecessary, but tell that to the people who want answers and results now.

We often feel or believe that quick actions and decisions fix things and we can now move on to the next challenge or action, but let me ask you – have you ever thought something was solved and finished and before you knew it, it reared its ugly head once again?  And why is this?  For starters our quick responses, decisions and solutions to issues, needs or wants are often made or taken without adequate knowledge, preparation or conscious awareness of potential consequences. 

We just hope things will turn out right.  Yes, hope is a wonderful life approach, but in the end just hoping will never be enough.  Sooner or later we have to do something that moves us in the right direction and what we do, if we want favorable outcomes or results, must be done with maturity, awareness, consideration of future possibilities and patience.

Traits that many people lack today and why?  Is it the relentless and dramatic increase in available information?  Is it a gradual increase in arrogance or self-righteousness? Or is it something more?

I watch people – drive fast, eat fast, click here for instant answers and solutions spend far too much time playing with their “communication toys” and the result is they are addicted to instant.  Well, I don’t care how fast you’re IPod or I Phone searches – life is not instant and never will be.

And as long as you continue to believe that if you don’t get an answer to your question or information needs in seconds – you will live with frustration which leads to stress which leads to illness which can lead to death.

Is it worth it?  You can’t get everything done today you want to.  You can’t do everything you want in your lifetime.  I’m not suggesting we not have plans, goals, wants, dreams etc., but that as we live the days of our life that we learn to focus on what really matters and that is not having more face book friends, screens filled with links to dozens of websites, participating in endless LinkedIn conversations or trying to convince the world that we are in charge.  You are not and never will be so why not just relax and live your life and what it brings to you as the hours and days pass?

“If matters go badly now, they will not always be so.”  
Horace

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