Are you - surviving, existing or thriving? Tim Connor

Are you - surviving, existing or thriving?

Tim Connor

Simple question? Far from it if you are willing to look deep inside your life philosophy, agendas, goals, expectations and lifestyle.

Having survived four recessions during my career I know what it means to survive, but from time to time we need to ask ourselves – is this all there is or can I, should I expect more no matter what is going on around us?

Let me share one of my life’s mantras with you before we dig into the details. “I refuse to let other’s behavior or life circumstances determine my joy, happiness, success and inner peace.”

I have to admit this has not always been an easy task given the uncertainty of life with all its variables and unknowns, but in the end most of us are given 60-90 years to live, exist or survive and in the end it’s not what life brings to you that really matters but how you handle what it brings.

To Survive – to remain alive or in existence or able to live or function, especially succeed in staying alive when faced with a life-threatening danger. My definition – Making it from one day to the next doing the best you feel you can with your available resources and skills and attitudes.

To Exist – to be, especially to be a real, actual, or current thing, not merely something imagined or written about.  My definition – same day different stuff. No hope for something better.

To Thrive – to grow vigorously and healthily.  My definition – to live each moment with gusto, zest, passion, excitement and a sense of adventure.

OK, a little more detail if you are still with me.

Surviving – To survive during challenging times takes courage, patience and faith, but in the end to just survive when more is possible is to waste time and life.  Many people lack the resources, courage and hope during difficult times to attempt to achieve more or to tap into their creative ability and passion to do more with life and they fail to even try to become or do more.  Is it fear or some other mindset that keeps them stuck in survival mode?

During my career I have spent more than my fair share of time in survival mode, I even admitted that there was little I could do – and I preach this stuff – go figure!  Imagine someone who won’t spend even a few minutes a day reading, praying, planning or working to leave survival mode and move forward.

Looking back over my long speaking career I have learned one very important attitude – that during times of tribulation, uncertainty and trouble – if I allowed myself – I had some of my most creative approaches and ideas to solving my problems – but the one thing that kept me from embracing or even trying them was due simply to my “stuckness attitudes”.

Are you stuck in survival mode in your career, business, relationships or life in general? Ask yourself three simple questions. 1) Why are you stuck? 2) What can you do to leave this situation in the past? 3) Are you taking action and if not what is your excuse or excuses?

Existing – I can’t tell you how many people I have met during my life who are just living their life from one day to the next just getting by.  Their life lacks adventure, fun, passion, excitement, fulfillment and even simple laughter.  The age range for these folks ranges from late teens to late 80’s and the reasons are always the same – I don’t know what to do.  I don’t have the time?  I don’t have the resources?  I am too young or too old.  I don’t have the skills.  I don’t have the education.  Life isn’t fair.  Blah, Blah, Blah. You don’t have to be a multimillionaire to volunteer some time at your church or some other non-profit organization.  You don’t need a lot of education to mentor someone.  You don’t have to have grey hair to share your experience or life lessons with others who might benefit from them.

Existing is not living - it is wasting life’s valuable moments.  We all have a purpose to accomplish while we are here.  God gave each of us a unique ability and reason for living.  When we fail to honor this - we are born, we exist and then we die.

People who exist die wish many regrets and excuses, but in the end do these really matter once you leave here?  I seriously doubt it.

Thriving – Thriving isn’t about money or wealth.  It isn’t about fame, power or control.  It isn’t about superiority, education or your address.  Thriving is getting and giving as much as you can to life while you are here.

You don’t have to have a college degree to thrive.  You don’t have to drive the best car in your city to thrive.  And you don’t have to be the best looking man or woman in the world to thrive.  Thriving is simply embracing each day of life with gusto, courage, passion, faith and an attitude of gratitude.

Thriving isn’t about economic circumstances.  It isn’t about your career, position or influence.  It is the willingness, ability and desire to fill each day of your life with learning, growing, becoming and sharing.

Thriving is about living life from a love rather than a fear mindset.  It is about filling each moment of life you are given seeing the larger purpose of your life and not spending time in the weeds complaining, whining or feeling envy, greed or selfishness.

“The life which is unexamined is not worth living.”  

Plato